Life sucks until it doesn’t

How my life miraculously sorted itself together

What up folks! 👋🏻 I know, I know…it’s been a while since I last posted. Truth is, the reality of post-grad came at me hot, fresh, and definitely not ready. My spirit was knocked in all sorts of ways and I found myself anxious 24/7. Imagine Mercury in retrograde 💫, but lasting almost an entire year. When you’re in a funk, it becomes hard to express yourself authentically. I’ve gotten more introverted as a result and I guess I’m on a journey to rediscover how to express myself again.

It’s actually incredible how life has a way of uniting our hardships, especially when it comes to transitional periods. Everything I experienced was experienced by someone else before. That was a weird sentence, but ya feel me? We like to play the victim and feel small… but in reality, a lot of our problems are pretty much universal. It’s easier to give in to those troubles and stay trapped in one place than to admit you’re headed towards an inflection point— whether you’re buckled in or not! This inflection point for me was changing my career path and basically saying FUCK YOU🖕🏻to my Biology degree and my family’s expectations. It was extremely difficult and made me a shell of myself, just coasting through time (sounds dramatic but literally what it felt like). It’s unreal how career stability cleared up a lot of negativity in my life. I guess when you’re older (🗣 boooo), your identity gets connected to work. So as a result, work becomes a huge component of your overall wellbeing. If you’re lacking in one major area that you deem significant, it’ll produce a shitty self-deprecating domino effect. But guess what? Almost everybody I talked to has felt this, are still feeling this, or will probably feel this again! I guess we just have to take it as it is — a huge pain in the ass that we all have to deal with. A big part of growing up is dedicated to realizing this.

But yo, I’m loving life right now. Like really loving it. I wake up every morning with purpose and I actually want to go to work. I’m proud of what I do and I think I do a good job at it. The millennial me chugged that tech kool-aid and I ended up as a Social Media Specialist for Google Developer Studio 👩🏻‍💻. I get paid to do what I love most — learn, create, and tell stories. Being in a “googley” environment, I’m motivated to leave an impact in the company that will provide groundbreaking and accessible technology for the world. Yes, it took personal effort. And yes, I had setbacks. But the comfort of knowing that I’m just naturally navigating the ebbs and flows of life made all the difference.

So if you find yourself approaching an inflection point, here’s my secret sauce to keepin’ it cool (some meltdowns will still occur and that’s OK):

1. Surround yourself with the right people

Try to embody the traits that you admire in others. It first starts with identifying why you want those traits. Next, comes figuring out why you don’t have them. And finally? You study your role, rehearse your lines, and play a character until one day — you’re not playing anymore. Surrounding myself with people who had their shit together made me want to get my shit together. While the most effective changes still come from intrinsic motivation, it helps to be around people who can rub off on you. Not only that, you make some genuine ass friendships that way too.

On another note, networking is the fucking move. Don’t be shy! Talk to people, borrow their lens to look at the world, and make it worth their time. You never know when you’re going to meet the right people at the right time. Straight up, I’m at my dream job now because of a friend’s referral. When humans go through the same shitty experiences, we understand each other more and should do our best to help out. Karma, baby.

2. Make moves, even small ones

The hardest part is putting on your “adulting” pants. The moves themselves aren’t the problem because most likely, you know what you need to do (and if you don’t, Google it #notsponsored)It’s just getting yourself to do it. Change is always scary because it requires commitment and a lot of effort. But like what it says on that cheesy millennial pink wallpaper I found on Pinterest, Let’s do the damn thing!”

Baby steps are still steps, as long as you’re moving. Get your feet wet, get acclimated to the waters, but then pick up the pace. Push yourself a little more each time and learn from each step. Ideally, you’ll reach a point where you realize you can overcome anything. You’ll have a refined toolkit of “moves”, powered by your glowed-up spirit. That’s the beauty of being human — the ability to build on past experiences and be better everyday. Our troubles are endless but it’s what we make of them.

3. Keep yourself grounded and stay grateful

This 👏 is 👏 it👏. I try to practice mindfulness daily because it helps me stay chill. Growing up in a Buddhist household made it easy for me to incorporate these values into my life. Whenever I was emotional or overwhelmed, I counted my lucky stars for what I already had.

For example:

  • I’m healthy
  • I have a loving family and awesome friends
  • I have a place to sleep every night
  • I get to enjoy the taste of fried chicken

And the list goes on! There’s just so much in life to appreciate that you shouldn’t just focus on the negative. Make an effort to list out all the things you have going on for you. Over time, you won’t have to list them out anymore and you’ll feel the gratitude naturally. Stay grounded my dudes; you’ll have a clear head to tackle on problems efficiently.

Bottom line? Shit sucks sometimes. Shit will keep coming. You can’t avoid the shit but you can totally change how you view and approach it. Make it a productive shit!

The motto

That’s it. That’s the blog.

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